Black Girls' Night Out: Rachel Zane

Meghan Markle as Rachel Zane
This woman's plotline - if you can even call it that - is beyond disturbing.

In the last DVD of the first season, Rachel's characterization becomes increasingly dependent upon the white boy's presence.  Like, screen capping her without him has become an even bigger chore since 98% of her life onscreen involves him.

...Even after he starts dating some other chick he's known longer than her.

In addition to that, I've been reading up on this character and I'm not seeing the part where she passes the LSAT and goes to law school.  Keep in mind, Suits has been renewed for a third season, which is set to air soon.

But let's take it from the top.

In one episode, Rachel is framed when a witness list is leaked to a rival law firm.  No one except the white boy believes her innocence, and no one from the law firm besides him contacts her...even though she's worked there faithfully and flawlessly for five years.

Sound familiar, Black ladies?

But that's not even what galled me so.  Look at who betrayed her:

"Shoulda just stuck with The Game.  This check wasn't even
remotely worth it."
Y'all, when I saw Pooch Hall's name in the credits, I knew right away that 1) he wasn't staying, and 2) he was going to do something trifling before he left.

Suits didn't disappoint.  Keep in mind, this is a young lawyer fresh out of Harvard buried beneath crushing school debt, and now his career is ruined.  He's the first young associate of color in a guest starring role - complete with lines and everything - and this is how he goes down.

So this is, what, the fifth Black man (out of five total) we've seen on this show portrayed in a negative light?  And this is just the first season!

And yeah, the white boy rides in on his horse to exonerate her, but I was still left with the nasty aftertaste that comes with watching a Black woman being wrongly terminated with no one coming to her defense...after she's framed by a Black man.

Moving on....

As mentioned before, the white boy is seeing someone.  Rachel is growing increasingly jealous, and she's more than annoyed when the white boy's girlfriend uses her as a delivery/messenger service.

Asking Rachel to deliver a suit to the white boy....
Asking Rachel to pass on a message to the white boy....
Yes, boo-boo...that really did just happen to you.
"How ever did I get myself into this mess?"
But instead of reacting like, well, one of us would, during a late night work session, she goes does this:

"I would never do this in real life."
"Oh God...it wasn't a dream."
"I think I'm gonna barf."
And just like that, Suits regresses from being a legal drama for grown-ups to a made-for-TV, OMG-Brittani-totally-kissed-Skyler-at-prom-behind-my-back drama worthy of the CW. In order to compensate for their meaningless transgression, they stage a double-date which ends in disaster because Rachel chooses the white boy's pathetic excuse for an arch-nemesis and he, quite predictably, tries to feel her up in a restaurant.

"Thiiiiis just keeps getting better and better.  Note to self:
call my agent in the morning."
Naturally, the white boy gets upset, sticks up for Rachel...and his girl promptly walks out on him.

Which begs the question: since when is it wrong for one to guy to stand up to another guy when the mistreatment of a woman is involved?

Anyway, the white boy doesn't want to lose his girlfriend, so he and Rachel have an argument - again, worthy of the CW - in which they furiously agree they can't continue their little flirtations at work.


"Seriously, though...when can I get more scenes without this guy?"

"Yes...I know how these pictures look, but I swear to you that
I am a sistah."


  1. I'm skeptical. I don't believe this is a WoC. Not looking at these friggin' screencaps. She look whiter than a fuckin' snowflake.

    And they can get the entire fuck outta here with that bullshit-ass storyline. Bye, y'all...

    1. I can tell she is "folk" but white people cannot and to me that is a cop-out and doesn't count. Do they ackowledge her race? Sometimes they obliquely acknowledge it by letting a dark-skinned black dude date them.
      Like when you saw Devil in a Blue Dress, were you confused b/c you didn't know that the white people thought that Jennifer Beals was white?
      When girls like Rachel Zane are next to real white people, I think it's pretty obvious. On their own, they can kind of pass but her hair is not naturally straight, and that isn't her original nose. I am sure about the first and would bet money on the second. Store bought noses almost always give folks away (unless you go the Halle Berry route and make sure to get a new black nose. She has the BEST nose job I have ever seen).
      I'm pretty sure if you saw her in real life, you'd know.
      But yeah, it is a cop out to cast a girl who can pass.

    2. Like Neo-Prodigy said before, I think they're white washing her on the show. Google her. You'll see the difference.

    3. and that isn't her original nose.

      Something's been bugging me about her nose but I couldn't pinpoint it. Now I know!!!

    4. Yeah, if you want to have a nose job and not have it be obvious, it needs to be in the same ballpark as what you started with.
      That nose does not fit her face, and I'm personally not fooled by it.
      I'd bet that if you saw a childhood picture of her, she looks like a tiny, lighter version of her black mother.
      But she reminds me of other light-skinned, lightly freckled black people I've known in the past. I never knew him, but I think one of my grandmother's brothers had this look (with gray eyes that still pop up from time to time in the family to boot). Definitly reddish hair and very fair. And my aunt's ex-husband looked like this too, but with his original nose and unstraightened hair.

    5. Oh, God her nose bugs the hell out of me.

    6. Yeah, it's like she's part of the Jackson family b/c they have 3 generations of bad nose jobs ruining their looks...

    7. Oh, the Jacksons....

      I swear, their combined nose jobs is the stuff of horror movies. After Michael's (RIP), LaToya's is the worst and it becomes more apparent with age. I still don't understand why Janet felt the need to go under the knife as her original nose was flawless imo. *sigh* Guess that's what being in HollyWTF does to you.

      As for Megan? I'm going to have to re-convince my brain that she's really a white actress with a good tan, because knowing she's a WOC and looking at her episodes in retrospect is irritating the hell out of me. I want to go back to when her scenes with the Boy Wonder pops up, and I'm going, "Yea, yea, yea....can we get back to Lady Torres?".

    8. Megan's nose is too big for her face. It doesn't fit. It's like she's got fine features and then they went Mr. Potato Head on her nose.

      Plastic surgery fail.

    9. I'm not old enough to remember Michael Jackson's real nose but had some older black female co-workers who grew up on the Jackson 5 and told me who their "favorite" Jackson had been. I of course had to look up how they looked back in the day and yeah, it totally made me want a time machine b/c Jackie Jackson would have definitely been my boo.
      I have never seen a better looking bunch of people (and seriously, with 9 kids there should have been more than one no-cute one statistically speaking, sorry Tito) who wrecked their faces so egregiously.
      The girls were gorgeous, the boys were hot, their skin was beautifully brown, and their afros were the stuff of legend.
      When you look at the pictures of that family at the peak of their looks, you can understand why people envy/hate us so much. B/c I'm sorry, I have never seen a large white family with that many lookers. The best looking white people I've ever seen always seem to be outliers who look like foundlings when with the rest of their relatives.

  2. Okay, finally saw the episode in question. Actually a white girl getting upset that a white man, especially HER white man, is paying more attention to the black girl (even if you were getting assaulted or something) does ring true.
    At no point is any man supposed to acknowledge a black woman as equal to a white woman, or they get really nasty really quickly.

    And I'm mad that Pooch Hall's character, who actually did go to Harvard Law, gets wrecked for his deceit while the white boy who is a TOTAL fraud is still skating by. You see how they get chances they didn't earn and multiple chances at redepmtion whereas we are out (as Rachel and Pooch's character demonstrate) at the FIRST sign of impropriety.
    However, black grads of top law schools getting crapped on in high brow firms and basically ensuring that they are all gone within 5 years of being hired...that is real. Very real.
    Total aside, but Louis's character reminds me of the child the Paul Lynde never had (or Templeton the Rat from Charlotte's Web which was also voice by Paul Lynde)...

    1. However, black grads of top law schools getting crapped on in high brow firms and basically ensuring that they are all gone within 5 years of being hired...that is real. Very real.

      Which sickens me to no end, since all this show does is go along with it.

      And I'm mad that Pooch Hall's character, who actually did go to Harvard Law, gets wrecked for his deceit while the white boy who is a TOTAL fraud is still skating by.

      Case in point.


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