More of the Same

By now, I’m sure we’re all aware of the events at Spring Valley High, where a police officer decided that a reasonable reaction to a 16-year-old girl being well…a 16-year-old girl was to drag her out of her chair and throw her across the room.  Most of the world was outraged, but naturally there were many people who thought that the officers’ actions were perfectly justified.  That would include the teacher, the administrator, and Raven-Symonè, among others.

And now, although they may not necessarily agree with Officer Fields' actions, plenty of students (black and white, boys and girls alike) don’t feel that he should’ve been fired, and want him back at work.  The students staged a walk-out last week, some sporting #BringBackFields t-shirts. 
I’m just going to be honest here:  as a black woman, I'm not very happy about this.  We’re the first ones to speak up when others are brutalized by police officers (or anyone else), but where is that same level of outrage when it's us being dehumanized and mistreated?  Black women have been making this point for a long time now, and finally it’s something that’s starting to be discussed among a wider, more diverse audience.  These kids certainly have a right to speak up for what they believe in--and they should--but it’s a shame that it’s at the expense of the poor child that was brutalized in front of the entire world.
The below screenshot is a comment that I found on Tumblr that someone has posted with this article.  He didn't pull any punches, and what he said hit pretty hard.  Because...damn. 

(click to enlarge)

Do you agree with his comment?  Or do you think his criticism of black men and how they treat black women is too harsh?


  1. I agree with him whole-heartedly. *shrug* I think that more than anything right now, Black women need to put ourselves first from hereon out.

    1. Perhaps some of those kids from Spring Valley should have looked at the students from Berkeley High's example. Now that is the way you supposed to do it. So proud of them.

      For those Black men/POC who stand up for Black women, thank you for your love and concern,but these days, I don't know what to say. Maybe it's a generational thing..idk. When I was growing up,the Black men/boys that I was exposed to was NOTHING like those boys on those Spring Valley High pictures. I have no kids but if I had kids that went there( or any school for that matter) that stood up for a man like that I would be embarrassed the point where I would secretly want to disown them. Ironically, some of the parents have said that the school's administration encouraged the students for that. Even if that was the case, they can think for themselves. No excuses whatsoever! They just gave themselves a very bad name.

      As I just said, maybe it's a generational thing . While I wouldn't want to put all young people in the same category, Geno seems to be on target on what he said. I mean, never in my life have I seen so much self-hate/ in my life. You get on a bus and hear guys just constantly say the "N" word to each to each while a non-Black person be right in their face hearing it, people claiming that they love who they are but will put down Black men/women...again..in front of a non-White person's face thinking they are pretty doing it(e.g. IR/AMBW blogs) even to a point that they will let THEM put down other Black folks, people supporting(e.g The SV High incident) causes that are against THEM and just somebody doing a Raven-Symone/Don Lemon number. I just don't see how they can do those things.

      I was thinking about two people when I was reading this story: my ex and my grandparents. My ex who was from Togo.. fascinated me with himself and his culture. He was proud of who he was. When he first came to the States, he told be that he seen some young AA kids talking and using the "N" among themselves. He was confused and thought that it was a racially derogatory word in which I didn't tell him any better because it is a bad word in my book and ..to me..whether/whether not it's for " greeting" purposes( Oh god!) there is nothing respectful using that word to anybody.

      Far as my late grandpops. Some people accused him being thinking that he was "better" than other Blacks because of his mixed race( Black/Indian) background and up until 1986,I didn't always think that the Indian side was all that accepting of him,but he was a grounded guy who always educated us about being Black . Not only did he want us to be proud of who we were but he also didn't want us to disrespect ourselves in front of people( e.g. the two teen coons from Spring Valley). He was so adamant about us being proud of or heritage that he wanted us to go to HBCU's like he did, or take a trip to Sapelo Island GA /South Carolina to learn about the Gullah?Ogeechee community/culture. Although he didn't live to take us there..it was just the idea that he wanted to be as thorough as he could about our history ( I will try to go again). To him anybody who can disrespect their race/culture wasn't a true ally to his community or love themselves.

    2. Ankh...words stolen right out of my mouth. I agree wholeheartedly. We're on our own.

    3. I agree, BUT black women have been saying this for years and got raked over the coals for it. What is sad is when black women do look out for themselves get attacked for not caring about the "community". Check any other race of women and who do they look out for? Themselves first and foremost. If it doesn't help them or their children they don't worry with it. (Yes you do have some that do put their own issues on the back burner, but for the most part its Team Me).

      The crazy thing is most black women will never see the truth.

    4. Yep..we can't worry about what the world think of Black women because as a whole, they could careless about us. Like you just said..we're the very first people who will come out when a major injustice come out and that is sad.

      I'm sitting here thinking about the recent events that have taken place with Black girls/women and a couple of weeks ago , then thinking about another article that I read about a young Black British who was attacked by two White male racists in her native England.( source: clutchonlinemagazine.com). According to her, there were White and even POC's on the bus,but for 45 mins ,with the exception of one Asian man on there..nobody helped this woman out and even when she caught a cab , she was slandered. Guess what the passengers was more worried about? her" rowdiness". No one asked about her well being.To have read this woman's story made me sick.

      Black women have to love themselves first before they can love anybody else. God knows, if we don't, family unit will further go South.

    5. I'm not surprised. How many black women here have been attacked by black men and no one lifted a finger to help. Its open season on us.

  2. LOLOLOL...for some reason, I was just reminded of Bougie Black Girl's recent Facebook post:

    Self hating Black men be like:

    I want a light skinned Afrocentric biracial Black nonBlack woman with real hair, who is natural with straight hair. She must have a job and is educated, but willing to teach an uneducated brother. She must have her stuff together, but must be willing to fix and uplift a broken man. She must brag about her man, but is humble about her accomplishments because she doesn't want to outshine him. She has no kids, but takes care of his kids from his baby mama. She must be skinny with a 45 inch butt. She has to have good credit and is willing to let him use hers because his is bad. She has to cook even though she works. She must take care of him when she comes home from work even though he spent all day playing Madden or they both work. She must let him lead even though she makes more money and pays the bills. She must be submissive, independent, god fearing, is monogamous, doesn't want to get married and accept his polygamy. She must be a virgin, perform sexual gymnastics, but isn't a hoe while he has different baby mamas.

    Black women be like:

    I want a Black man with a job, who wants to get married, is educated and has never been to jail.

    The Black community be like:

    Black men can have preferences, but Black women are asking for too much.

    1. BBG said: " Black men have preferences,but Black women are asking for too much."

      So if Black women have standards it's over kill? It's like the self-hating ones are saying, we get should get the best of the best of the best ,while we should settle for scraps on the table..um..no!

      Here is something that I notice about self-hating Black men, most of times they request for the best when they are not at their best. I remembered just browsing and glimpsed at a commercial. On it , a minister on there asked a question about men and women wanting people to have certain quality traits about their future spouses but asked them were they " clean" enough for the..their future mates?I was glad that he asked that because why should BW want to settle for less? No, I don't think badly of Black men,but I just think poorly of the self-hating ones and other non-Black men who look down on us.

      As a Black woman, I have standards because I want better for myself and if I had a family, I would want better for them. I also have the because of the experiences I had witnessed in my life that I wouldn't want to repeat. For example, people will misinterpret me and think that when I say I prefer who isn't a high school dropout, they think that I'm looking down on them because of my higher education. No , that isn't it. There are high school drop outs who can be smarter and having a lot of common sense than some colleges graduates. I'm just a person who believes that parents should lead by example. If I were to drop out and attempted to encourage my child to stay in school, my kids may say that I had no right to tell them that when I didn't stay in there. I mean..it wouldn't look right. Sure, some people may say " Do as I say and not as I do..." How can you desire something that you didn't do? Even if we both have our education , encouraged them and if they still dropped out of school,nobody can easily blame us for not doing out jobs. My parents and my grandparents weren't drop outs, neither were my sibs and me and I would raise my kids the same. I would expect for the to be high school graduates and go to college..I hope.

      More importantly, I would want for a guy to be productive, be a leader,a great family man and to be a committed man. I admit, my folks divorced when I was a kid,but it doesn't mean that..too often people say...I have to end up with an uncommitted man. It's just about knowing your worth and who you feel is worthy of your heart and life. Right now, I'm not interested in marriages or relationships but everyday I'm learning something new about the real world and myself. I went from a girl who didn't know what I wanted in life into a woman who is now sure what she wants and is learning from the mistakes from my past and even present and praying for the best future.

      If those self hating guys want superficial women, let the have them. Everytime I read something about Black women not getting married because of( put in the dismal news) I don't pay attention to the " studies" , to the self haters and haters because most times their idea of a " good" woman is about making fun of them and trying mold them into their image of what Black women should be. The guys that BBG described on her post haven't grown up. Though I have no idea what it is to be a man, I know that those self- hating guys have no idea what it is to be one. I certainly would not want my daughter with a man who self hates. I do my best not to be overselective,but if wanting the best in men means not wanting a life of disappointment ,so be it.


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